Have you ever wondered why you act the way the way you do in social or intimate situations? It’s common knowledge that everyone is different, which means that everyone will have different reactions to things. But many people do not know why others or themselves act the way that they do; the way that we act within the relationships that we have with our families, friends and significant others can all be linked to attachment. Attachment can be defined as” an affectional tie that one person or animal forms between himself and another specific one – a tie that binds them together in space and endures over time”. SOURCE)
Attachment is far from a connection with someone, it’s a bond that makes you want to have consistent contact with that person and also it causes you to experience distress when separated from that person. This view of attachment is clearly defined in the attachment theory developed by John Bowlby. Bowlby credited childhood as a serious role in the formation of attachments and how early experiences can influence person’s future relationships. The relationship that we form with our parents or our primary caregivers is our earliest attachments, which allow us, as infants, to feel safe when in close proximity to our caregiver.
The attachment to ones primary caregiver allows the caregiver to give the child the care and protection that the child needs for survival. Although Bowlby didn’t conduct any research of his own, he concluded that there were four main characteristics of attachment; proximity maintenance, safe haven, secure base, and separation distress. Proximity maintenance refers to the longing of being close to the one that we share an attachment with. This is because we enjoy the companionship of those we have an attachment with and want to be near them whenever possible.
The next characteristic, safe haven, is that we seek comfort from those we are attached to in times of fear, pain and distress. Secure base is a characteristic that is mostly geared towards childhood, but describes the primary caregiver as a secure base that a child can use to explore their surroundings, while also knowing they can return to the security of th n to the security of their caregiver. The final characteristic is that we experience separation distress when parted from an attachment figure.
Attachment is important because the type of attachment a child has with their primary caregiver has a huge influence on their childhood and in their future as well. What research did John Bowlby base is theory on? Bowlby was a psychologist, not a researcher; because of this he didn’t actually conduct any of his own experiments to help form his theory. Instead he based his theory on previous research that had been done by others. He believed that infants are born and programed to form attachments in order to survive. One major experiment that John Bowlby based his attachment theory on was one conducted by Harry Harlow.
There were numerous experiments completed by Harlow that focused on the social isolation in rhesus monkeys. These experiments showed the destructive effects of interrupting attachments early in life. One form of the experiment took infant monkeys and separated them from their mothers. Once separated they were placed with surrogate mothers, one being a simple wire frame that held a bottle and the other being covered in a soft terry-cloth material. As a result, Harlow found that they infant monkey would obtain food from the wire surrogate mother, but would rather spend their time with the soft terry-cloth surrogate mother. Arnett & Maynard, 2013)
When comparing the infant monkeys from Harlow’s experiment to monkeys that had been raised by their real mothers, the monkeys from the experiment were more fearful and suffered from social and emotional troubles. These experiments also allowed Harlow to discover that there is a critical stage where normal, healthy attachments can be formed and if disrupted then the damage done could be near impossible to reverse. Another experiment that Bowlby had based his theory off of was one conducted by Konrad Lorenz. This experiment helped develop Lorenz’s imprinting theory.
During this experiment Lorenz had a group of goose eggs and kept them until they were about to hatch. Once they were reading to hatch, he had put half under a mother goose and kept half near himself. After the geese had hatched he had copied a mother geese quacking noise which caused the geese to think of his as their mother, and following him around while the other half followed the mother goose around. Lorenz had found that the geese follow the first moving thing that they see during a 12-hour period after hatching; this is called imprinting.
This experiment also showed that attachment is natural and that one is born with it being programmed genetically. What has helped develop the attachment theory further? Using BowBowlby’s theory Mary Ainsworth was able to conduct a semi-structured laboratory experiment called the Strange Situation, which allowed identification of infants who used their primary caregiver efficiently as a secure base. The Strange Situation is not meant to see whether the infant is attached to the caregiver or not, but rather to give insight on the quality of the relationship.
The experiment consists of 8 episodes; 1. The caregiver and infant are familiarized to the room where the experiment is being held, 2. The caregiver sits in a chair and allows the infant to play freely for a few minutes, 3. A research assistant, “the stranger” enters the room first sitting quietly then talking to the caregiver and then interacting with the infant, 4. The caregiver leaves the room, 5. The caregiver leaves and the stranger leaves, 6. The caregiver leaves again leaving the infant alone, 7. The stranger returns and tries to comfort and interact with the infant,
8. The caregiver returns again and the stranger leaves once more. Through the research completed by both John Bowlby and Mary Ainsworth, four attachment styles were created. In order to better understand those attachment styles we must first understand when and how an infant forms attachments. Bowlby believed there were four stages of attachment; preattachment, attachment in making, clear cut attachment, and formation of reciprocal relationship. Preattachment, newborn to six weeks, infants are able to attract adults to them by crying, smiling, and making eye contact.
They are not yet attached to their caregiver, but rather calmed by the company of others. The attachment in the making stage, six weeks to eight months, is when infants begin to develop trust in their caregivers and know they can count on them when they are in need. They also are more likely to be calmed by their caregiver rather than someone else. From the age of eight months to eighteen months-two years, a child is in the clear-cut attachment stage. During this stage attachment is officially established. The child will now start to experience separation anxiety when their caregiver leaves.
In the final stage, formation of reciprocal relationships, separation anxiety decreases due to the development of language. The child develops a sense of security and understands that when their caregiver leaves they will return. Using this information on the stages of attachment, Ainsworth was able to use infants that had already formed attachments and thus use her findings to create four attachment styles; secure attachment, anxious avoidant insecure attachment, anxious resistant insecure attachment (ambivalent), and disorganized/disoriented attachment.
When a child has a secure attachment they feel secure and happy and are excited to explore new surroundings. They also trust their caregiver and know that they will be able to support and protect them. While they do show signs of distress when their caregiver was absent, they are certain that they will return. Having a caregiver that is reliable and sensitive to the needs of the child will help develop a secure attachment. Children with an anxious avoidant insecure attachment are not certain that their caregiver will give them what they need.
They are usually unresponsive to the caregiver leaving, but feel anxious on the inside. They do not typically explore their surroundings and distant themselves emotionally. A child that has this type of attachment usually has a caregiver that is disconnected and emotionally distant. Children who feel insecure and display anger have an anxious resistant insecure attachment (ambivalent). They cannot rely on their caregiver to give them what they need because their caregivers behavior has been unpredictable and neglectful.
For the last attachment style, disorganized/disoriented attachment, children in this style do not fit into any other form of attachment. They could act with a variety of different emotions. Their mothers also act with varying emotions. (Schacter, Gilbert, Wegner, & Nock, 2014)Although the classifications of styles typically are stable from 12-18 months, they are able to change due to a stressful or changing experience. (Arnett & Maynard, 2013) What does the theory leave out?
People assume that parents that are honest, nice, and respectful will have children with the same traits and parents that are liars, rude and disrespectful will also have children with the same traits. This was not what J. R. Harris, a critic of Bowlby’s theory, believed; she believed that peers have a greater influence on children than their parents do. This belief brings us to the Nature versus Nurture debate. Nature refers to the genetics that parents pass down to their children, while nurture is the way that a child is raised.
Harris does not agree that nurture and environment is the same thing like many textbooks lead one to believe, and she also calls this the nurture assumption. She believes that what a child may learn in their home life may not be used in their outside world. This assumption causes parents to think that if they raise their child wrong, it will ruin their child’s life. This is not the case however, because a child is subject to peer pressure and even if parents try to raise their child the best way they know how, their children could still end up acting more like their peers.
