Toni Morrisons Song of Solomon touches upon topics ranging from racism to relationships. One such topic thats discussed is self discovery, namely Milkmans self discovery. Milkman travels through a series of apocalyptic events that eventually allow him to remove his blinders and let him look at life in a mature manner. Milkman is introduced to the reader in the beginning of the novel as a nave, shy child who is seen more than he is heard. From early on Milkman encounters confrontational situations, such as demanding to be treated as an adult yet behaving as a child as shown in the following passage:
I know Im the youngest one in this family, but I aint no baby. You treat me like I was a baby. You keep saying you dont have to explain nothing to me. How do you think that makes me feel? Like a baby, thats what. Like a twelve year old baby . . . Is that the way your father treated you when you were twelve? (Morrison 50) He does not comprehend the fact that he and his father Macon are virtual opposites of each other. Milkman fears and respects his father at the same time, yet knows that because of his physical shortcomings he can never be like his father.
Because of this, he attempts to differ in every way he can. Morrison explains that Macon keeps himself well-groomed and clean shaven, while Milkman desperately tries to grow facial hair. Macon has a great aversion towards tobacco and alcohol; Milkman tries to put a cigarette in his mouth every fifteen minutes and keep a fifth of liquor in the toilet tank (63). Milkmans immaturity is exposed here: rather than trying to improve on himself to be a better person, he decides to become the foil of the person he idolizes.
He reinforces his image of being childish during a confrontation with his father. During this incident, Macon hits his wife Ruth and Milkman retaliates by striking Macon. When Macon comes to Milkmans room to explain his reasoning on hitting Ruth, Milkman thinks to himself What the fuck he tell me that shit for? Just come to me like a man and say, Cool it. You cool it and Ill cool it and well both cool it. And Id say okay you got it. But no. He comes to me with some way out take about how come and why (76).
Its not that Milkman is disgusted with what he hears as much as he just does not want to hear his fathers reasoning; to him it seems like just another lecture. Rather than trying to comprehend why his father possesses these feelings, the selfishness in Milkman takes control making him take a hostile attitude at things. An attitude that makes him want to feel like hes the victim and everybody is out to get him. Milkmans immaturity extended beyond his father and into the ways he dealt with relationships with people outside his family.
At the age of twenty-two, Milkman had been sexually active for six years, and few of these relationships ever lasted. Instead of sustaining a steady relationship, he uses these women only to satisfy his own childish needs and leave them when he is satisfied. In his opinion: women [are] like beers. The best woman [can] be compared to the first beer, the one that the throat is thirsting for. The second woman [can] be compared to the second beer, the one that accentuates the pleasure of the first one.
Then comes the third woman . . . the third beer, the one that [nobody wants] but is taken anyways (91). Extending this thought illustrates how Hagar fits into Milkmans lifestyle. To Milkman, Hagar is the third beer: not that he posses any true feelings for her, just the idea that sleeping with Hagar [makes] him generous. Or so he [thinks]. Wide spirited. Or so he [imagines]. Wide spirited and generous enough to defend his mother whom he almost never [thinks] about, and to deck his father, whom he [fears] . . . (90) Eventually Milkman decides that he no longer wants to have a relationship with Hagar.
Rather than talking with Hagar about theyre relationship like a mature adult, Milkman thinks that it would be best to just write her a note and present her with a cash gift. To Milkman, this seems as the most gentlemanly way that he can end the relationship, but when Hagar eventually receives the gift, she takes it as a payment for prostitution rather than a gift from a lover. Although immature and self-centered, Milkman begins to mature: Maybe Guitar was right-partly. His life was pointless, aimless, and it was true that he didnt concern himself an awful lot about other people.
There was nothing he wanted bad enough to risk anything for, inconvenience himself for . . . He never kept a woman more than a few months-the time span that he said was average before she began to make permanent arrangement-type noises (197). He realizes he is useless and has no concern for the well-being of anyone else. Furthermore, Milkman continues on to give settling down some consideration . . . a wife, a house, and a partnership with his father maybe. . . . Signs that exemplify Milkmans thinking for the future and the possible acceptance of responsibility.
Milkmans maturity begins to extend from the way he carries himself to the way he treats other people, namely his friend Guitar. While conversing with Guitar about smoking and drinking, Milkman senses that there is some unrest in him. Being concerned with his friend, Milkman wants to know why [he was] running around with Empire State last Christmas (153). Guitar responds in a roundabout manner by stating that he is just helping him. Milkman, still not satisfied with the answer, knows somethings going on with [Guitar] . . . and [he] would like to know what it is (153).
Guitar answers this question with silence; Milkman continues to explain that: weve been friends for a long time, Guitar. Theres nothing you dont know about me. I can tell you anything-whatever our differences, I know I can trust you. But for some time now its been a one-way street. You know what I mean? I talk to you, but you dont talk to me. You dont think I can be trusted (153)? Milkman now not only is concerned with Guitars well being, but whether Guitar trusts him. He begins to realize that his self-centeredness and lack of maturity causes people to not completely trust him.
Acknowledging that people dont have full trust in him and feeling others pain illustrates Milkmans desire to be considered trustworthy, in turn allowing him to start maturing mentally. Milkmans concern starts spreading from his own self, to his closest friend, to a person that is like a mother to him, Pilate. Although Milkman does have a relapse to his childish ways by stealing Pilates green sack, he does have sincere sorrow for his deeds. Sorrow for the fact that he steals from a person that made his first perfect egg, the person that treats him like her own, the person that saves his life. . .
How can he steal from a person that gives him something he never really possessed, a sense of family? Milkman understands that at his age, childish acts such as petty theft and fibbing are completely unacceptable; had he realized this before acting, he would have not done such a deed. The final spike in the coffin of immaturity comes in a conversation with Magdalene. At first the conversation starts out as a harmless chat about the past, but soon heats up. During this exchange, Milkman acknowledges to his sister that [he has] done some things in [his] life. Some things that [he] doesnt feel too good about (213).
Finally Milkman acknowledges his wrongdoings to a person other than himself. Magadelene states her true feelings towards Milkman by telling him that he is a sad, pitiful, stupid, selfish, hateful man, and that she [hopes his] little hogs gut stands [him] in good stead, and that [he] take good care of it, because [he doesnt] have anything else (316). Speechless, Milkman turns around and leaves the room thinking that it [is] good advice, why not take it (317)? Throughout his entire lifetime, Milkman always possesses the idea of his relationship between himself and his sister as being close and one of good feelings.
It is not until now that Magadelene speaks her true feelings and expresses her bitterness at her brothers actions. Milkman is broken from Magadelenes words, but in a way, this shock relieves him of his childishness. He no longer thinks hostile thoughts when somebody expresses theyre feelings, he accepts somebody elses advice, and most importantly, he decides to change himself for the better. Milkman sincerely believes that his childish behavior has affected his relationships among family members and friends, and now possesses the desire to mentally mature and change his ways.
Milkmans evolution from a selfish, hateful child to a mature adult although slow, does occur. At first, Milkman is resilient to change; he thinks that the problem is not with himself but rather with other people. Slowly, he begins to understand that he cannot carry on with his immature lifestyle forever because it would lead him nowhere. Although he understands this, it is not until Magadelene directly tells him her true feelings that his desire to mature comes about. With his mature, more weathered self, Milkman goes on to discover the history of his family.