The English language uses a single word to express the broad spectrum of the meaning of love: from the “I Love You” in a passionate statement to a random letter signature like “Same Love.” The Greeks have defined love in more sophisticated terms such as Eros (intimacy and Passion), Ludus (Joy), Philie (Fellowship), Pragma (lasting love), Agape (love for All) and philautia (self-esteem).
The first type of love was Eros, which derives its name from the Greek god of fertility. It represents the idea of intimacy, passion, and desire. The Greeks do not always consider that this is a positive thing, it was perceived as a form of madness caused by the arrows of Cupid. It’s about letting go of the visceral and fleshy joys that may seem scary to some. Letting go can be what many people seek to drink and dance at night.-How far do you let it go?-Do you feel overwhelmed by the sensations?-Do you forget the world in your arms? Are you in a state of flux?-Do you feel a difference in your vivacity when you are with your partner/spouse?
The second diversity of love is the Philie or friendship. It is a virtuous love that is not awake. In addition, Philos refers to a general type of love that is used for the love between family, friends, desire or pleasure of an activity, as well as among lovers. Another terminology is storage for parental love.
For Plato, the best kind of friendship is the one that lovers have for each other. It is the Eros that becomes the Philie, and still in return nourishes the Eros to nourish the relationship of a desire to a greater understanding and to grow. Real friends share their experiences and learn to live with such a satisfying life.
How to classify your friends (social media friends, drink, loyal friends, funny friends, mentor friends)? How much does the Philie have in your life? Do you feel your partner/spouse/relationship as a friend? What kind of friend? Do you want something different?
The third diversity of love is Ludus, playful love affecting affection between children or young lovers. Ludus, which means “to play” in Latin, is used by those who see love as a desire to have fun with each other, to do indoor and outdoor activities, to mock, enjoy and play harmless jokes. The acquisition of love and care can be part of the game. Ludische’s lovers want to have as much fun as possible.
We all had a glimpse of her in the early stages of relationships while flirting and teasing. And we always do it when we laugh with friends, or when we’re going to dance. It is when we let joy work as if letting go is the rule to come. Are they playful? Do you like playful? Not? What would I change? Can you be Kindahnlich together? What do you need to be Kindahnlich? Are you still laughing at the other guy’s jokes? Do you use Word games? Are you laughing at your awareness? Can you laugh when you’re together? Are you floating in a sea of normalcy? If so, what would bring back his vivacity? What would your smile do? What would make them smile? Do you know what makes you smile? Do you laugh without restraint? Do you like the same activity? Are you proposing new ones? The fourth love is pragma. It is love when it matures and grows. One in which a deep understanding was developed between married couples or arranged marriages. It focuses on long-term interest and personal qualities rather than on intimacy. Pragma is more about giving love than staying in love than when the couple first fell. It is the passion of Eros, pushed to the long bank, to compromise, to help the relationship with time and to show patience and tolerance.
Do you have the security you are looking for in a relationship? Do you have common goals? Do you have predictability and patterns in your relationship? Are you satisfied with the qualities of your partner? And the last, but not least, Philautia, or the love of being, has two types: narcissism and self-esteem. Narcissism means selfishness, with a grandiose vision of his talent and the desire for admiration, such as the characterization of a personality type. It can be accompanied by pride and arrogance and contempt for others.
Differentiation must be made between self-esteem and trust. People with self-esteem can invest in projects and people without fear. Failure, rejection, grief, disappointment do not hinder or diminish. Because of their flexibility, they are open to growth, relationships and fast to joy. There is no time to insist on mishaps. Aristotle said: ‘ All friendly feelings towards others are an extension of a man’s feelings for himself. “Or as it is in today’s jargon” cannot be downloaded from an empty cup “. What feelings are you planning? How do people feel when they’re around you? How did love/hate for you? What does love increase? How is your self-talk going? Are you spicing your bugs or looking for improvements based on feedback? The ancient Greeks have diversified their love. So where does your preference on the wheel of love come from if you have one? Are you doing this? What does it take for it to happen? Does your partner/spouse feel the same way? How can the spark stay alive?